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Home >> Diet Forums >> Is embarassment holding me back?

Is embarassment holding me back?

Heather said: "I just thought I'd say hello and welcome you to Featherish. If you set your mind to something, you can achieve it.. To get started, you might want to set a small goals so its easier to achieve them. It could be to walk for 20 minutes every day or to cut back on sodas, or to drink more water. Just try and make strides to live a little healthier. Happy to have you aboard!"

spectrachic311 said: "I think that was sort of my problem initially as well. It seemed like every girl on my floor was skinny and pretty and I was the "fat one". I hated shopping with them because I was embarrassed about grabbing the big girl clothes while they all bought cute tight jeans. When I decided to lose weight, I didn't want to tell anyone because I was afraid that people would say "Well, it's about time!" or "Good, you could use it". So I didn't tell anyone that I was going to start eating healthier and I just did it. I also didn't weigh myself initially because I KNEW I weighed a lot and I didn't want to confirm it. I just ate my healthier food for a couple of weeks and....WHOA! My jeans started fitting again. Then they got baggier and my friends started noticing. THAT'S when I told them I was trying to get healthier. And they were SO supportive and nice about it! They gave me tips and food suggestions and recipes and offered to help me shop for flattering clothes. So yeah, it can be embarrassing at first, but don't let it stop you. Pretty soon you'll be one of the athletic types too."

DBrew said: "I think also that when alot of individuals reach their goal weight, they think they are no longer going to have to watch their diets and that is a huge problem for many of us ex-chubbers. I have had my weight off aside from pregnancies for about ten years and it fluctuates at times and I really have to always be on the watch because it creeps back on so easily! I surely do not want to go through having to lose 50 pounds or so again!"

DBrew said: "I think the fear that you would be held accountable for your actions is both very real and also very responsible. I think you are just afraid you cannot do it but you can do it and I think this website will truly be a help. Good luck and maybe next time that oppertuntiy comes around you will not be so intimidated. Sometimes a little accountability is a good thing."

klynnfosh said: "I know how you feel. I sometimes will not make the first move because I am afraid people will know I have a weight problem. Well the truth is I know it and they do to, not everyone will have the perfect shape and if you let you fear turn you away then it will be hard to make the change, we sometimes think if we just forget about it, it will go away! The only way to make it go away is to face the fear and move forward. I have to tell you the first time I went to weight watchers and got on that scale I was so embarrassed and thought I would die, I weighed 183 pounds then. Well once I faced it and decided to give it a chance it worked for me and actually became easy. I got down to 138, that was 14 years ago. I have since gained back the weight because I thought I did not need them once I got to where I wanted to be and I was wrong, I needed the motivation to stay there. I am back on track and trying to get back to where I need to be now, but unless I could admit to myself the problem I would never had made the first move. As far as telling your weight to your boyfriend, you have to remember it is only a number and he is your boyfriend, so will it change how he feels about you? It shouldn't if he truly cares for you! We all lie about our weight and it is because we are the ones who can't face it not that others will see us differently. Just be proud of who you are today and make changes to become the person you want to be, we all have to change if we are to get where we want to be. Best of luck, and don't worry we all know how you feel."

angel_rising said: "Welcome. I think we all know how you feel. I know that I put off joining a gym for a long time becuase I was embarresed about my size. I thought that everyone there would judge me and that I would feel awfull. When I finally went I relised that I was the only one judging myself, and that I should be proud that I was doing something. One of the things I love about the site is that I can be honest here and not feel judged. I am sure that you will find the same. Good Luck Angel"

VTcnix said: "Hello, I am new to this forum and this is my first post. Some quick background: I am currently 5'8 and weight about 174lbs. I have been battling with my weight as long as I can remember (I am almost 23). I have recently tried to commit myself to losing weight and with my boyfriend have started back going to the gym and making healthy choices with my eating Current Issue: My school was offering a free health assessment today. I have been excited about it for weeks. I was looking for the room when I hear another girl get directions to where it was. She was very athletic and had the build of what I aspire to be. I felt my nerves kick in as I followed her. When I peeked into the room, it was full of very athletic "gym types" doing the measurements. I immediately turned on my heels and was gone within seconds. I regretted doing this because I felt like it was a sign that I was not committed to my goal of loosing weight, but I could not get over the embarassment that I was not in shape and they were about to find out. I think this speaks to a bigger problem,.. I know they say to be sucessfull you have to share your goals with people so that they can help to motivate you, but I have such a HUGE problem with that. I know that people can NOTICE that I need to get in better shape, but I have trouble ACKNOWLEDGING to others that I am taking steps to do something about it. Even my boyfriend who knows I am trying to get in shape I havent told my actual weight because I am worried that he will be put off. I am also nervous to tell people because what if I fail? (I have many times in the past.. even when I did tell others) I guess that is why I have turned to this forum because I feel that in a way I am taking steps to build a community of supportive people around me who know my goals. Has anyone else experienced anything similar? What did you do to get over it?"

freestyler said: "Hi VT, I know what you are speaking of and the first thing to realise is it's perfectly normal. The fact you turned around and walked out of that room, doesn't mean you are weak in any way - it means you aren't happy with how you think others perceive you at the moment... In the 7 Habbits of Highly Effective people a multi million best seller, Dr. Stephen Covey says (and im paraphrashing) that one of the key drivers of awesome and amazing change in people's lives is dissatisfaction with what they currently have! In everything you can view something as positive or negative, okay you might regret walking out of that room. But there is a positive side to the coin, the very regret will be a positive force in motivating you to make changes! You have a boyfriend which is great, and if he is worth his salt at all, he will see straight through your appearance to who you really are (which i'm sure he already has!) You're lucky, we all have blessings we take for granted. I sure wish I had a girlfriend, at all - to worry about how they perceive me =) If you put you're mind to this, you will reach your ideal weight, and you will look back on these days and remember all you have achieved!"