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West Texas HeatWest Texas Heat
Heather said: "That's some funny stuff.. The seatbelt as a branding iron cracked me up.."
Heather said: "I know what you're talking about.
Tar and asphalt get nasty in the heat. Yuck."
UniqueMystique said: "....an article that was published in our local newspaper.
[B]Finally understanding the Texas heat...after 10 years[/B]
OK, enough is enough. I understand the true meaning of heat now!
Having been raised in South Carolina, where the average temperature during the summer was a dreamy 94 degrees, accompanied by plenty of humidity to keep your sinuses nice and moist, the heat in West Texas has been simply amazing to me over the years.
When I moved here in the Summer of 1997, I traveled from my sister’s home in Lake Jackson (near Houston) to Big Spring. Since my car’s air conditioning unit had gone to the little garage in the sky many years prior, my sister convinced me to make the drive during the night.
Now, don’t get me wrong. It was hot in Lake Jackson when I left. But it was a soothing, coastal heat much like what I had grown up with and enjoyed time after time in Myrtle Beach, S.C.
However, as the sun began to come up while I was just on the other side of San Angelo, I learned two very important lessons that morning. First, don’t eat anything with mushrooms from Denny’s, and second, invest in air conditioning if you’re going to live in West Texas.
Of course, being the rebel I am, I still don’t have AC in my Jeep Wrangler, but it’s not by choice... trust me.
And so, as the sun came up on what has come to be — at least in my mind — the great divide between civilization and the great desert, I began to do what everyone without air conditioning did that day. I began to cook.
Of course, nearly a decade later, I’m a little more accustomed to the idea of “black flag days.” I’ve finally learned cutting your grass at 2 p.m. during the summer isn’t just dangerous, it’s suicide no matter how big your yard is.
I’ve even learned those fancy misters — you know, those silly things that blow a cloud of wet mist on you to cool you off — actually become a baster once you break the 100 degree boundary.
There are other, fine ways to tell it’s summer in West Texas. They include:
The birds have to use pot holders to pull worms out of the ground.
The trees are whistling for the dogs.
The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
Hot water now comes out of both taps.
You can make sun tea instantly.
You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron!
The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.
You discover that during the summer it only takes two fingers to steer your car.
You discover that you can get severely sunburned through your car window.
You actually burn your hand opening the car door. We’re talking an emergency room burn, here.
You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7 a.m. Thirty seconds later, you stop sweating because you’re already dehydrated.
Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, “What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?”
You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.
Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.
The cows are giving evaporated milk.
And now, as I approach the 10-year anniversary of my coming to the Lone Star State, I’ve not only learned to respect the Texas heat, I’ve come to understand it.
It’s very simple. It’s evil, much like the demonic spirits that took over Emily Rose and that house in Amityville, and it wants very much to devour me. Is that a sane fear? I’m not really sure. But I can tell you this... there are three people in my lil’ corner of the world that get my undying loyalty. My mechanic, my doctor and the guy that works on my air conditioning unit!
By the way, thanks again, Jimmy.
Written by Thomas Jenkins, a South Carolina transplant still fumbling through a case of Texas culture shock."
UniqueMystique said: "[B]The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.[/B] Absolutely true!
[B]Hot water now comes out of both taps.[/B] It's happened!
[B]You can make sun tea instantly.[/B] Well....almost instantly.
[B]You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron![/B] Yep...Yeowwwwch!!!!!
[B]The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.[/B] Yep...I've felt that way at times.
[B]You discover that during the summer it only takes two fingers to steer your car.[/B] I've done this on numerous occasions!
[B]You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.[/B] It really does...and it's oh so gross!"
UniqueMystique said: "[QUOTE=spectrachic311]Oh, and UM...you're absolutely right about the asphalt thing...it gets like that sometimes around here. Does it stick to your shoes, too?[/QUOTE]
Yup....it sticks to shoes and whatever else gets near it. What sucks is that they've just resurfaced the roads here. By resurfacing I mean.....they've just dumped a layer of rock over the existing raod and are letting people drive on it to set it into the old gooey tar. Lots of broke windsheilds will be occurring."
spectrachic311 said: "Haha, that's funny. Although we're more famous for our winters up here, it gets darn hot in the summer too. I, too, have found out that I can steer with two fingers, usually wrapped in a napkin that I found on the floor of the car. And there have been several occasions where I've sat on the seat belt and yeah, OUCH!!! Oh, and UM...you're absolutely right about the asphalt thing...it gets like that sometimes around here. Does it stick to your shoes, too?
The sun tea thing is about right too...when it's REALLY hot out you can make it in about 15 minutes. That's pretty fast, IMO.
And it's about the ONLY time that the close parking spots at Walmart are free because people are parking by the tree islands, LOL. I guess that's what it takes to get people to walk across a parking lot around here. :)
Hope everyone is enjoying the FIRST DAY OF SUMMER!!! And be safe in the heat, everyone! :)"
Kat_the_Amazon said: "*laughs*
It's like that down in louisiana too!!
It's been like that all week... uk.. and i work outside too!"
texasluvv said: "[QUOTE=kittykat79]
Man I love Texas. I can't imagine living anywhere else :)[/QUOTE]
yup i agree!! Texas does get really hot but i love it! <3"
kittykat79 said: "I totally agree with all of that. Man I remember one time I burned my hand so bad on my door handle of the car and i had blisters on my middle finger. I've also had the seat belt brand also...so much for trying to put a seat belt on one handed with the cell phone in the other. i had that mark for a good 2-3 weeks.
Man I love Texas. I can't imagine living anywhere else :)"
klynnfosh said: "Hot it is! Your neighbors in Arkansas can sympathize with you. The heat and humidity in the summers is terrible. I work at an auto repair shop and we are busy from April to Sept., and guess what with, air condition repairs. It is the request each and everyday by everyone who walks in our doors. We love the buisness but are always ever so greatfull when fall arrives!"
mssteph800 said: "too cute. lol it is so true."