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Life is to shortLife is to short
spectrachic311 said: "You're right...life is WAY too short to focus on something so small as one's weight. I think when I was heavier, I thought my problems would go away if I were thinner. That I'd magically get a boyfriend and become popular and have no problem dealing with my problems. As I got healthier, I realized that being healthy only made me better able to deal with my problems. I no longer was so tired all the time, so I had more time to study. I felt better about myself and started taking better care of my appearance, so I looked a lot better. I started feeling more confident and started striking up conversations with guys instead of sitting in a corner waiting for a guy to come and "take pity on the fat girl", which is pretty much what happened at homecoming in high school. :P
I also kind of thought all my imperfections would dissappear when I lost weight too. Not so. I still have thick legs, but they are nicer looking now. I still have a ghetto booty (but it's much more toned and nice looking now). I'm still impatient and my hair still gets frizzy. My dog still thinks I'm the same person, except she knows that now I have more energy to play with her.
I think we're so focused on weight in our society is because it IS so hard to stay thin in our environment. Yoyo makes a good point...20-30 years ago there weren't nearly the amounts of snack foods, convenience foods, etc. Plus, portions were actually normal sized so it was harder to overeat. Now we have microwaves and to go foods everywhere. Plus, most of us are very sedentary due to desk jobs and having to commute to work. People back in the day were more focused on living their lives and probably only compared their own bodies with their friends' bodies, not freako celebrity bodies. I think nowdays, being thin is like being really powerful. People think "Wow, so-and-so is so thin! I wonder how she manages to avoid all the temptations around here". I worked with a girl once who was a bit overweight, but not huge. She truly respected me only because I was thin and she always told me how jealous she was of my body, etc. I felt bad....I wondered if she had a life other than worrying about my body.
But yeah, I definitely think the key to a good life is a bit of balance. Eat right most of the time, let yourself have fun, and don't worry if you aren't perfect because no one is! :)"
Scarlett said: "You are right. Losing weight is not just about losing the lbs but it is also about finding yourself and who you are, and really seeing what your true potential can be.
I never realized the true esteem problems I had until I started losing weight and started analyzing my way of thinking preweight loss. It was not pretty, I didn't feel pretty, and I think that I portrayed that thought. As I have lost weight though I have come to embrace a whole new level of self confidence, I have learned that my body will never look like a long and lean models (b/c I'm shorter and athletically built), and I have accepted this. Who set this standard of beauty anyway, right? I have come to realize that the way I am built is so perfect for who I am and what I like to do. Of course there are imperfections, but certain things can't be changed, so why worry about them, right?
You know for me losing weight has helped me realize over all that I can do anything I put my mind to, I never was able to lose the weight before (I had tried several attempts before my successes now, which I plan to be lifelong successes) b/c once I lost 20 or 30 something lbs I think subconciously I was afraid b/c I have been overweight since I was a teenager. I was afraid that I would get that unwanted attention from men the way I did when I was younger before gaining all of my weight (not really men at the time when I was younger, but boys, you know how dealing with prepubescent boys can be, especially since I was the first in my grade to really start developing). I think I was also afraid of going into uncharted territory, and going out of my comfort zone, which at the time was being a big girl.
But now...no I have revamped my whole way of thinking since then, and I find that I am a lot healthier not only in body, but in spirit too. My soul feels lighter b/c the burden of my own fears and feeling like I wasn't beautiful (which I now feel that I am) isn't there anymore.
I never did realize before I started losing weight, or even WHEN I started losing weight that it would have affected me as profoundly as it has, but guesswhat? It totally has. I feel great, and I think others see that, and that to me is good too.
But I guess that is why so many of us refer to our weight loss as a weight loss journey. And we CAN do anything we put our minds to. :D"
yoyo said: "I often wonder if one of the reasons we are so obsessed with weight is TV... and newspapers, magazines and the like....
I think that up until the 1960's, although people took pride in their appearance, they were not bombarded with pictures of stick thin women all the time.... For example, if they went to the cinema once a week, there was Jane Russell, Marilyn Monroe, Sophia Loren and many, many more, who were wholesome and curvy women...
Most people I knew then were only interested in what happened in their own locality, except when it came to wars or disasters or sport.... For example, when I was a teenager, I thought that only Scotland and England played football... I had to be informed that Brazil, Argentina etc also played... but, like I said, people tended to mostly concern themselves about their own back yard.....
I also think that people were healthier then as they were a lot more active - they tended to still walk/cycle everywhere and their jobs were more manual.... They didn't need keep-fit clubs then (not if you were having to hand wash clothes for 6 kids) but neither were they really obsessed with their weight, they expected to put on extra baggage with the birth of the children and as they progressed through the trials of life.... But neither do I think that they ate such huge portions and neither did they tend to eat between meals. - I remember the first time I went to Florida, I couldn't believe the portions that were being dished up in diners/restaurants and the like.... But it is getting like that here now.....
It could also be that - because we don't have large families anymore, we have more time to become self-obsessed, whereas if we had 6 or 7 kids to look after, we would be too busy!!!!
I don't know when it started to change in America....
Anyway, maybe I am talking rubbish, but how I wish we, in the west, were less obsessed about size and started to realise what is really important in life....."
sally25 said: "Well I am new to this sight and have been enjoying reading some of the postings and found a lot of helpfull insightfull things here. Your comments brought up a lot of things I have begun to realize for myself in the last year.
All my life since i hit puberty and got boobs :) I have been aware of the fact I am a women , but in this world it has taken me longer to realize what exactly that means. All of my life I have lost and gained weight spordically finally a year ago at my biggest weight 215 pounds I decided once and for all I was going to loose the weight and I have , I have lost 46 pounds and four sizes so far. I have begun to realize it isn't about loosing the weight , it is about finding yourself , that you have to learn to love yourself before you can reach those things loosing weight will never make you buetifull, and although I think it is important to be active and eat right most of the time , I think it is sad the way young girls are bombarded with so much in the media.
It used to be as human kind that we enjoyed life for what it was , good food , good freinds , family and good times all that life had to offer know in this fast paced world it is all about what you have to offer on the outside and that is sad , I am not sure I will ever be the size 9 I was when I was a teenager but I am a size 12 and I stay active and eat healthy most of the time, but I've come to realize life is to short , to short to not go out and eat cheesecake with a freind :) or buy a pair of shoes i can't afford or something of that nature , I've learned that I have more to gain by looking in the mirror and feeling buetifull by what I see short arms and curvy hips and all of my imprefections besides whose to say what is buetifull and what is not, what we think of a size 14 at one point in time used to be average , so what happened , I feel like sometimes we are going from being to overweight to being to underweight as american's and ecspecially women , I see to many women walking around so unhappy by who they are so many young women so miserable and its sad , its sad to think they don't think they are worth something that they arn't pretty because someone says this is what you have to be , all i have to say i am glad to be a women and glad for who I am I look at myself sometimes and think am i really fat or is that just what the world says ?"