Want to watch people get defensive? Mention their bad habits

by Darren

I just started the Personal Growth section here at the Featherish Healthy Living Blog, and within my first few posts, it seems I struck a nerve with some readers. Now this is a highly important issue, so I think it’s worth mentioning early on. There’s almost no good way to approach any human being with the suggestion that they should change their behavior, especially if it’s the result of a long-formed and unchallenged habit that they hold dear.

For this reason, I never attempt to even tell anyone what bad habits I’ve dumped in the last few years. Whenever I’m around people who drink alcohol, and mention that I quit, they become uneasy fast. It’s almost as if I’m an ATF agent sent in to monitor them. They don’t quite trust a non-drinker, apparently. Nor should they. After all, I’m sober, and will chronicle all of their missteps the next day.

Even complete strangers seem upset about my announcement that I was happy to quit TV. I guess they’re not ready for “How I quit eating Meat and why I’m loving it”, which is fine with me, because it’s coming anyway. Maybe I should stop being so darn nice about the whole thing and just get out there and confront people.

Yeah, that’s right. I quit TV, eating meat, religion, consuming marketing, drinking alcohol, and a million other habits I haven’t even started yet. Why? Because I don’t want to be the average guy having the average life. I don’t want to follow the crowd, especially if they’re heading off the cliff, and I don’t worship the current false icons that marketers want us to call “lifestyles”.

So for all this time I’ve stayed silent. Allowing people to engage in their daily drama, unfettered by commentary from me. But those days are ending. But there’s no way I’ll approach a single living human and try to tell them that I’m right and they’re wrong. Whatever anyone decides to do is based on their perception of reality, and their level of wisdom and experience. People can be at complete odds with my thinking, and I still respect it.

But I think there are a number of people out there who are very interested in learning “How I quit smoking 3 packs of Marlboros a day”, because, heck, it could just prevent them from getting cancer. So, in that spirit, I’d like to approach some of the most common behaviors that people engage in, and try to determine if they’re “good” or “bad” for someone, without using a religious/political framework for discussion. Effective habits help to make life easier for people who incorporate them. And bad habits tend towards pushing people towards unproductivity and emotional darkness.

I’m pretty sure I’m not alone where I am, thinking that “Less is more” when it comes to what we really need. When Hurricane Katrina savaged New Orleans, the people with the fewest habits probably fared the best emotionally. There’s nothing worse than “needing cigarettes” in the midst of a disaster and not having a store to buy them so you can calm your nerves. Modern society is a marvel of technology and a triumph of learning. But for all of the accomplishments of man, and the ever increasing number of choices, it’s the bad habits that can pull people down.

So I’d like to invite you to read, and please note that I’ll do my best to try and offer my opinions on some controversial habits, without being judgmental in the slightest. I don’t think I have the best or only perspective on the subject, but I do have a genuine one.

What success have you had quitting bad habits? What would you consider a bad habit to be?